Confidence is a Skill You Can Learn

Sometimes it feels like confidence is something you either have or you don’t. As if some people are born with gobs of it overflowing, to the point where you wish a couple globules would bounce onto you. And others just don’t have it in them. Confidence is NOT something you may or may not have inherited, coded into your DNA, something innate to your being. The truth is confidence is a skill, it is something that can be learned, it can be developed.

For women, developing our confidence is essential to building the lives we want to lead and influencing future generations to do the same. Women are the fastest growing sector of entrepreneurs, with Black women leading the way. But according to the Global Entrepreneurship Monitor women across the board report ‘having lower confidence levels than men in their capabilities to start a business’. The reality is that women are capable of doing:

  1. Whatever we BELIEVE we can do and

  2. Whatever we CHOOSE to do

As a reminder, confidence is “a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.”If you feel like you lack confidence, here are a couple things to do to start building an environment for your confidence to grow.

  1. Check in with your self talk. If you keep telling yourself you are not capable, you will start to believe it. You are strong and powerful and damn convincing, so stop convincing yourself you aren’t worthy or smart or knowledgable enough to meet your goals.

  2. Take a look at the people you are spending time with. Are they supportive of your goals? Are they interested in your dreams, your aspirations, or only interested in what they want you to do. Are they excited when you meet a milestone? If not, have a heart to heart with them about it, and tell them the support you are looking for. See if they can give you what you need. If they can’t, limit your time around people who don’t hold space for the amazing ideas and plans you have for your future.

  3. Take a personal survey of your awesomeness. Write down why you rock. Try it for two weeks, every day. At the end of the day, write down what you did that day that you appreciate. What qualities do you possess that led to your success today or what actions did you take that made you feel strong and capable and self assured.

Let’s try it out and let me know how it goes!

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